By Ashley Burney
Mommy to Jamysen
born 28 weeks premature
July 2022
In 2019, we lost our daughter, Annabelle, at only 10 weeks old. Our world shattered.
Shortly after her loss, we became pregnant with our rainbow, Abigayle. She was born at 34 weeks due to a uterine rupture and had to stay in the NICU during COVID. It was a scary and isolating time. We struggled — there were days we felt like she might never meet anyone besides her parents or even breathe fresh air. Everything felt uncertain. Fortunately, we got to take her home a month later.
When Abigayle was just over a year old, we found out we were expecting again — this time with Jamysen. We knew the pregnancy would be high risk. We were scared. We weighed all of our options. After lots of tears and late-night conversations, we decided to embrace the unknown.
We had several scares throughout the pregnancy and many extra appointments to keep a close eye on her. Then, in the afternoon on July 15, 2022, we decided to go into Labor & Delivery after experiencing symptoms similar to what I’d had with the uterine tear during my pregnancy with Abigayle. I was admitted for observation and given steroid injections to help develop Jamysen’s lungs.
About 11 hours after the second dose, my husband Kalen decided to let my younger brother stay with me so he could get a break and rest for the night. Just as he got settled at home and made something to eat, my brother called him in a panic. I was screaming in pain, and the nurses couldn’t find Jamysen’s heartbeat anymore. The more they moved me around, the more intense the pain became. I was crying and yelling — it was terrifying.
Finally, the doctor came in and explained that I needed to be put to sleep for an emergency c-section. Not only was this the first delivery that my husband wouldn’t be present for, but it was also the first one where I wouldn’t be awake.
Thankfully, the c-section was a suggest and Jamysen was born at 28 weeks. She was taken immediately to the NICU, where she received the care she needed.
On Angels’ Wings sent a photographer about three weeks later — not only to take our first family photos, but to capture the very first time Abigayle ever got to meet her baby sister. That moment was so special to us.
Since then, OAW has given us so much support — support we didn’t even realize we needed. They’ve walked with us through NICU journeys, through the grief of infant loss, and continue to support us through the emotional waves and the unknowns that still come.
Looking back, knowing now what they offer, I wish I had connected with On Angels’ Wings back in 2019 when we experienced our first loss. Because I knew loss was possible, with Jamysen I had simply wanted a family photo in case something unexpected happened… but we were blessed with more than I could have ever imagined.
While Jamysen is now on the right track and developing well, we still had to do things differently in the beginning. We’re more careful about germs and exposure than we might have been otherwise. We’ve had extra follow-ups with specialists, just to make sure she’s doing okay. And thankfully, she is.
My hope is that more people learn what On Angels’ Wings offers and take advantage of the support they provide. The kind of support we’ve received is so personal — it makes you feel seen and heard. The people who are part of this organization truly care about your journey. They are knowledgeable, compassionate, and constantly looking for more ways to help.
They understand that every family’s story is different — and they meet you exactly where you are.
